Periods of Uncertainty

Periods of uncertainty can feel like a holding pattern . My life seems to shift beyond my control and I often have to go with it. I am someone who needs to create or connect to something. It helps me to feel grounded. Lately I have been in a state of floating…seeking.   My journey has led me to a deeper place. I am drawn in again to the mystical. I have been looking for an opening of calm and peace. Connecting with myself. When the noise fades away and there is nothing else, we have our connection to self. Sometimes it’s so hard to be still. I feel like I should be producing all of the time. I feel like if I don’t, I just might fade away. But will I? I’m learning to trust. I’m learning to sit with the open space. I’m learning to grow by sitting still and I’m letting my roots dig a little bit deeper into the ground. I sometimes question if that’s ok. I guess it has to be, because I can’t stop it. I have been buying more books and crystals, resting more, getting slow, getting quiet. What I’m being shown is that connection, belief, hope and love are here within me. I just have to open my heart more and more. We live in a fast track life and everyday it seems to get faster. We have to swim harder to get ahead. I just want to tread water sometimes and hope I don’t lose the race or get forgotten. Is there really a race at all? I just want to open my eyes and take it all in. Breathe in life. I have never wanted to feel like a machine but there is always the conflict because I am sort of all or nothing. I’m learning how to find the space in between all or nothing. I’m learning to flow but also learning to stay grounded. The life of a creative person is an interesting one (although we are all creators of our lives). Learning to live life with both feet on the ground but the head in the clouds. Doesn’t sound too bad.

Lauren

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